Tuesday, May 17, 2011

My Emma!

This my friends, was probably the second indication that God has a sense of humor! Rich being my first!

Emma is about to be 13 years old and not long ago, I teased about the fact that she may not make it to teenagehood! I am pleased to announce, I have chosen to let her experience it! She just thinks life is rough now!

When Emma started 6th grade, I thought that some thing, and i don't mean "something", I do mean some THING, had taken over my baby girls body. She became something that I did not know, could not reason with and some days, did not like to be in the same room with. I have stated before, and those of you who know me, know that I am a completely transparent person, what you see is what you get, I do not put up a front for anyone's sake.

Even into Emma's 7th grade year we struggled to even get along. But I must share with you that in the last couple months, we are managing to do much better. One night after a terrible couple of days, Rich left me at home to ponder things. As I was washing dishes, it hit me, HIT ME HARD. I was scared of my children. Not physically scared but emotionally scared.

I am the mother that instructs my children to do something and when that task is not completed or not completed correctly, I just do it myself, usually with a bad attitude and lots of anger. Rich reminded me that I am the parent. While completing the task that I had asked Emma to do, I begin to think of my fears.

If I MAKE my kids do something that they don't won't to do, then they won't like me! I was to worried about being their friend instead of the parent. After I finished cleaning the kitchen, I went to Emma's room and had a long talk with her. I explained that as the oldest, more responsibility is laid on her shoulders. She needs to lead by example. I also told her that I make the decisions that I make in order to protect her.

The attitude from a teenager did not automatically go away, but when she does get smart, I ask her "Why do I do what I do?" She responds, sometimes, most times, with a not so willing attitude, "You do it to protect me". Then she is obedient.

As a special friend shared with me, these moments are rays of sunshine in a cloudy day! Many of the days are cloudy, but in the little village of St Johnville, Rich and I remember that they are CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MEATBALLS!

I don't blog these things to complain or be negative about parenthood. Anyone who stumbles across my blog can see that Rich and I are so not textbook in ANY aspect of our lives together, but we are writing our own book and I just want people to know that it is OK not to be perfect and have others think that you live in 1960's television!

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